Motivation is the process that moves us toward goal orientated behaviour. When motivation is low, there can be all sorts of issues… loss of self-esteem, frustration, and just not getting sh*t done, to name a few!
 
Motivation can be extrinsic (external incentives) and intrinsic (personal, internal incentives eg: joy/curiosity, fear). Whichever form it takes, the loss of motivation, stuckness and peaking of motivation are all perfectly normal human experiences. This may not impact you too much as you go through life, however for some people, loss of motivation, or even feeling hyper focused on a goal can be really impairing.
 
There are loads of strategies to deal with this, but for the purpose of this blog post, I’m going to keep it simple. Here are a few steps to assist when motivation is feeling out of balance, or when you are feeling overwhelmed.
 

1. Start with self-compassion. Self-compassion is simply this: a) acknowledge things are hard right now b) do not judge yourself c) act with kindness d) accept your situation d) recognise you are not alone with this problem.
2. Don’t wait for motivation to magically appear (or reduce in the case of hyperfocus).
3. Break it down to something small (in the case of hyperfocus, this would look more like setting a limit/boundary). Here are some examples:
4. Put your perfectionism aside. Unrelenting standards will only interfere with getting back on track. They may exist and create noise in your mind, but do not let them be the decision makers!

 
Breaking it down…
 

• Exercise for 10 minutes instead of an hour
• Set a timer for ONE thing on your todo list and only do 15/20 minutes of that task
• Ask one question of your partner about something specific, instead of avoiding the whole difficult conversation
• Read 4 pages of your book instead of feeling bad that you haven’t read a whole chapter

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If you experience chronic low motivation, you may need to seek advice to assess whether this is mental health related, as issues such as depression, anxiety, and attention deficit can play a significant role in motivational dysregulation.
 
Be kind to you, Ange
 
Extra resource: The Pomodoro Timer

Recently, a client said something quite disturbing to me. I hear a lot of fairly disturbing things during sessions… life is full of suffering and hardship, and so it is difficult to shock me.

Here is what she said that made me jolt back in my seat…

“I’ve seen a lot of counsellors, but none of them have ever been kind to me about my story, I’ve always been judged”.

Um... say what?

As a counsellor, part of my job, in fact a very big part of my job, is to model empathy and kindness to clients. And why is that important? So that they can potentially offer it back to themselves.  It can be nearly impossible to move forward in life when there is a harsh and judgmental voice inside your head, criticising you and demanding of you.

Offering kindness to others can sometimes open a small gateway for their own self compassionate voice to be heard. And when we speak kindly inside our own heads, we encourage ourselves to move forward in an engaged way with life, without dragging around the burden of our self-critic.
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So, speak kindly to you…you need the encouragement not just from others, but also from yourself. 

As complicated as life is, sometimes we need a simple idea as a pick-me-up. 

Did you know there is some super interesting research out there about how to decrease your cortisol!

Cortisol is a hormone that is secreted when we are under stress... and its really important, but sometimes we get a little too much of it because of our crazy lives (right?). 

There are a lot of things we can do to reduce our stress levels (I'm sure you've heard it all before... get the right sleep, connect with your fellow humans, exercise, mediate... I could go on). Here's a great you tube clip on a really simple (proven!) way that you can reduce your cortisol and increase your testosterone (can sometimes help with sleep, mood and memory!). 

Enjoy finding out all about this simple little trick from Amy Cuddy. 

I love Mel Robbins. She's blunt and to the point, which seems to make what she has to say all the more clear. 

In this Ted talk, she shares her thoughts on how the four letter 'f' word impacts our decisions to really become who we want to be. 

And best of all? The odds of YOU being born, are 1 in 400,000,000,000. That's 1 in 400 billion (so many zeros!). So surely, it's time to get on and be YOU. 

Check out the talk here. 

Photo by Levi Saunders on Unsplash