Motivation is the process that moves us toward goal orientated behaviour. When motivation is low, there can be all sorts of issues… loss of self-esteem, frustration, and just not getting sh*t done, to name a few!
 
Motivation can be extrinsic (external incentives) and intrinsic (personal, internal incentives eg: joy/curiosity, fear). Whichever form it takes, the loss of motivation, stuckness and peaking of motivation are all perfectly normal human experiences. This may not impact you too much as you go through life, however for some people, loss of motivation, or even feeling hyper focused on a goal can be really impairing.
 
There are loads of strategies to deal with this, but for the purpose of this blog post, I’m going to keep it simple. Here are a few steps to assist when motivation is feeling out of balance, or when you are feeling overwhelmed.
 

1. Start with self-compassion. Self-compassion is simply this: a) acknowledge things are hard right now b) do not judge yourself c) act with kindness d) accept your situation d) recognise you are not alone with this problem.
2. Don’t wait for motivation to magically appear (or reduce in the case of hyperfocus).
3. Break it down to something small (in the case of hyperfocus, this would look more like setting a limit/boundary). Here are some examples:
4. Put your perfectionism aside. Unrelenting standards will only interfere with getting back on track. They may exist and create noise in your mind, but do not let them be the decision makers!

 
Breaking it down…
 

• Exercise for 10 minutes instead of an hour
• Set a timer for ONE thing on your todo list and only do 15/20 minutes of that task
• Ask one question of your partner about something specific, instead of avoiding the whole difficult conversation
• Read 4 pages of your book instead of feeling bad that you haven’t read a whole chapter

​
If you experience chronic low motivation, you may need to seek advice to assess whether this is mental health related, as issues such as depression, anxiety, and attention deficit can play a significant role in motivational dysregulation.
 
Be kind to you, Ange
 
Extra resource: The Pomodoro Timer

Control – does it matter? Why do so many people seek it?
 
Humans have a unique ability that the rest of the animal kingdom doesn’t have to contend with: we can contemplate the future. This is an amazing skill which helps us to plan, invent, celebrate, and bring our goals to life. It also helps us weigh the consequences of our choices. For example, if we are planning on going out and having a few drinks with friends, we can anticipate that we will need to organise transport home.
 
This ability to contemplate the future also comes with a dark side. It feeds our biological wiring for anxiety. For some, that anxiety becomes incredibly out of control and dominates daily living. Our minds can fill with dread at all the terrible things that ‘could’ or ‘might’ happen. We can expend huge amounts of energy in the future, and miss what is happening in the present. One way to soothe this anxiety is to try and control our environment, to put everything we can possibly think of in place to mitigate the many disasters we have constructed in our mind. But this can become pretty exhausting, and given the randomness of the world, it means we are outsourcing our peace of mind to chance.

So, what to do?
​
Firstly, understand what is happening. This ability of your brain serves both to protect you and to enhance your life. So understand it. Be thankful for it. But don’t let it be in charge. You can access this part of yourself when you need it, but nobody really needs and anxious controlling person over their shoulder all day. That’s exhausting.
 
Secondly, find ways to soothe your body. Being in an anxious state sets of all sorts of physiological reactions in your autonomic nervous system, including appetite changes, increased heart rate, and increased perspiration. Mindfulness meditation is a known antidote to these issues, and helps to soothe and calm your agitated state.
 
Thirdly, come to peace with the chaos of the world. If you have done good, solid work on yourself, the chances are you will feel more confident about your ability to handle what the world might throw at you. Be prepared, but not in an anxious, controlling way – be prepared in a grounded, stable way. The kind of stability that leaves you knowing whatever life throws at you, you will be ok. Work on what goes on inside of you, instead of what goes on outside of you. Don’t outsource your peace of mind.
 
Lastly, know your limits. If you have battled anxiety for a long time, you might need to seek professional help. You might need to see your GP. There could be any number of interventions and support that can help. Eliminate any shame you might have around seeking support… after all, if you wanted to run a marathon, you wouldn’t hesitate to get a personal trainer or a marathon specialist to help you. And life is a marathon, so don’t do it alone. 

Humans have an incredibly evolved and complex brain. In fact, there are still many discoveries science has yet to make regarding all the different ways our brain works.
 
One thing we do know though, is part of our brain’s role is to protect us, and it does this in several ways. One way is by using certain chemicals and hormones when we are in danger. (note: our brain doesn’t always discriminate between ACTUAL danger and IMAGINED danger). These chemicals do many things, one being that they activate what is called the sympathetic nervous system. This prepares our body to fight, flight or freeze in response to the threat.

Our sympathetic nervous system moves blood away from our limbs, and towards our large muscles (helping us run, and limiting blood flow if we are superficially cut), suppresses our appetite and sexual drive (who wants food or sex when they’re being chased by a lion?), increases our heart rate and capacity for oxygen, and increases our perspiration. As you can imagine, this takes a lot of energy and coordination! Additionally, these chemicals also suppress our more complex thinking and memory skills, so that we can react quickly, rather than contemplate. During a traumatic or stressful event, all these actions are occurring in your body.

So, what happens after that? Well, you also have a parasympathetic nervous system… and this system activates after the sympathetic nervous system, to calm everything down and conserve energy. Appetite may return, blood flows back in to the limbs, breathing slows… everything starts slowing down, for what some call the ‘rest and digest’ period. During this time, a person can feel more tired and ‘foggy’ than normal as the body tries to restore order.

​Here is a simple (but not comprehensive list) of things that are normal physiological experiences during and after a stressful or traumatic event:
 
During event:

• Increased heart rate
• Difficulty making decisions
• Loss of appetite
• Loss of sex drive
• Increased perspiration
• Increased breath rate
• Sleep disturbances

 
After event:

• Shallow breath
• Memory difficulties
• Lethargy
• ‘Brain fog’
• Changes in appetite
• Changes in sleep pattern
• Return to ‘sympathetic’ state… or similar physiological experiences eg: rapid heart rate, breathing difficulties

 
Remember: you are a unique physiological & emotional being, so your responses may be varied, according to the individual differences within your own system. If you are struggling with these symptoms, remember they are normal responses, but if they continue for an extended period, you may want to consider getting additional support through your GP, counsellor, psychologist or trusted health professional.